Minutiae
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"Chuck Norris doesn't read books; he stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them."
- ChuckNorrisFactsdotcom

Wednesday, March 09, 2005
(In Mr. Burns voice:) Dish Network you have made yourself a pair of powerful enemies today.

How on earth can a company: a. offer to sell customers a product on their website b. have the customer choose a service plan, equipment package and installation date and time c. collect credit card info and send a 'welcome to the family' email then d. follow all this by not showing up then hang up on the customer twice when they call to ask what happened, inform the customer that all the online stuff accomplished nothing, close out the service ticket (complicating further service,) and hang up again?!??! Beeeeeatches sonsofbeeatches.

Dude, I worked customer service and I can't even begin to list the systemic problems we've discovered today. I mean 3 people within the same company who 'accidentally disconnect' the customer prior to resolving the issue and none call the service number they confirmed not 2 minutes previously? That's shitty customer service guys and it's gonna eat your business out from under you. Allow me to remind you that this is a subscription service. My decision to continue to send a payment each month is contingent on not pissing me off enough to cancel.

Setting up your online billing so that customers give you their credit info and believe that they've completed a transaction, but omit the part that charges the installation fee, thus stalling everything pending a payment the customer has no way of knowing they didn't make because they were never prompted for it?!? Then fail to catch the error or contact the customer for the week between the order and the scheduled install?! Yargh!

After speaking to 2 supervisors then offer ONE free month of HBO and Cinemax OR a 24-48 hour wait to speak to another supervisor but only if we didn't accept the offer of a free month. My husband the IT Director and former customer service call center employee, in over an hour on the phone, was able to accomplish nothing but stroke inducing fury. He spoke to a total of 9 people and none were able to help.

I've gotten some bad customer service in my life. I've called supervisors and been sharp. I've on a very few occasions left no tip. But generally I'm fairly indifferent to indifferent service. Rarely am I really and truly angered by bad service. This is top-three all-time jaw-dropping incompetence. At this point it's worth pursuing because we're either gonna get 3 months free service or we're gonna get more astonishing tales of OFFENDING your customers. We're talking
surreal atrocious. How on earth do these people manage to stay in business?

Thing is, had any of the first three people managed to offer someone here tomorrow or the next day I'd have been mollified. Rather, they told us it was all our fault, there was nothing they could do, it would be at least another week (there are 5 local distributors that install and they are not that busy,) and hung up on us.

Dish Network is managed by David from The Office. (In fact we may have encountered his Bangalore doppelganger.)
Dish Network sucks donkey nutsack.
Dish Network (a company running SATELLITES) appears to be incompetent to run a functional e-commerce platform or customer support center in the year 2005.
Dish Network has outsourced their customer service and it shows.
Dish Network employees do not understand that it is the same number of minutes past the hour no matter what part of the world you are in. (Not kidding. This was a southern call center, not even across the dateline.)

They say happy customers tell their friends, unhappy customers tell EVERYONE. I may still end up with their service (We're still waiting on a call back from a supervisor.) but I sure as hell wouldn't invest my money in that company. Consider yourself warned.

posted by Rachel 3/09/2005
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If any of you readers are living without a dishwasher and can't get a built-in for whatever reason, allow me to recommend the Danby DDW1805W 18" portable dishwasher. Muy Bueno. It just isn't civilized to live without a dishwasher.

It's on casters so when you're not using it hooked to the sink faucet, you just tuck it wherever you've got 18". It holds 8 place settings, so one or two loads per day. This teeny sucker is a little louder than a normal dishwasher (largely because the surrounding cabinets aren't there to muffle the noise,) and it takes a little longer but it gets the dishes clean with minimal involvement from me and that's the important feature. I'd also recommend appleappliances.com for painless internet appliance shopping. Very pleased.

posted by Rachel 3/09/2005
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